less skin, more clarity

Saturday and Monday have transformed how I perceive and respond to my passion. Saturday's trip outdoors, despite its lack of actual climbing on my part (I was relegated to the ranks of belayer on account of the number of first-timers that needed belaying), only served to heighten my desire to see and do more. I mean, there was the "off-roading" in the Civic, which was awesome...but that's another story. I'm talking about the way things come into focus, the way I can spend six hours just in the vicinity of the granite, a rope in my hands, and be utterly content. And Monday...Monday's crack climbing session tore up my hands, as usual, but I was nearly overwhelmed by the total sense of my own motivation as a source for perseverance. It was just me and the wall, dancing and conversing. I'm in my element there, shoving my bleeding hands into a concrete fissure, squeezing and pulling. I feel strong and present when I'm doing that, and in those moments I am doing something I choose and I want to succeed at. I like that feeling.